Saber-Toothed law
From the always enjoyable (and highly informative) Dimplomad comes his laws of the Saber-Toothed Tiger.
Lying on the bed, recalling the horror I had been through and plotting revenge
against the political officer and all her descendants for sixty generations, I
lifted the glasses and looked at the small TV screen across the room. No glasses
on and I could read the crawl on CNN! This Lasik stuff works! The prior day the
screen would have been a total blur. I rushed to the window, and although the
light still bothered me, I could see a cat walking on the sidewalk some ten
floors below! A cat, I could clearly make out that it was a cat -- and not a
blob which could have been a rat, a dog, a shoe, or who knows what. I remember
the thought flashing into my mind, "G-d, what would a near-sighted caveman do?"